Lifted this from a blog. Anybody seen this bozo?
"Today (Wed), we went diving. Bunch of yanks on-board from one of the many resorts here. One of them, to put it mildly, was a complete jackass. His name was Chris - which is embarrassing. First he got in and his tank fell off. I mean, I ask you - had he not heard of checking things before jumping in? Another girl then decided that she didn't like waves and got back out onto the boat without even getting her hair wet! It's the sea love, get used to it! Meanwhile five of us were waiting patiently at the bottom on the reef wondering what was going on. MUPPETS! Second dive was a bit better even though this Chris chappy was sucking up his air like it was going out of fashion. He had to end his dive prematurely. Prior to that he had tried to "ride" a turtle. What a moron. The dive master managed to stop him as a fully grown turtle will easily break your arms or at the very least give you a very severe bite - remember they graze on coral. We were wishing the dive master to let him have a go anyways - are we bad people?"
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But then what do I know, I am but a mere caveman