Portofino Resort- Now with a new BEACH BAR!!
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#140728 - 12/18/01 06:04 PM Christmas Cake Recipe from the Zekester
CAPTAIN bigzeke Offline
Ingredients:
1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup of brown sugar
lemon juice
4 large eggs
nuts
1 bottle Vodka
2 cups of dried fruit

Method:
Sample the vodka to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the vodka again.
To be sure it is the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.
Repeat.
Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
Add one teaspoon of sugar. Beat again.

At this point it's best to make sure the vodka is shtill OK.
Try another cup .... just in case

Turn off the mixerer.
Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuckin the cup of dried fruit.
Pick fruit off floor.
Mix on the turner.
If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers pry it loose with a drewscriver

Sample the vodka to check for tonsisticity.

Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something.
Who giveshz a shi**

Check the vodka.

Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.
Add one table.
Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find.
Greash the oven and [#%!] in the fridge.
Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.
Don't forget to beat off the turner.

Finally, throw the bowl through the window and finish the vodka.
Fall into bed.

CHERRY MISTMAS!
_________________________
There is only one cure for baldness. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.

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#140729 - 12/18/01 09:54 PM Re: Christmas Cake Recipe from the Zekester
ScubaLdy Offline
BIG - were you making this for ChooChoo?
_________________________
Harriette
Take only pictures leave only bubbles

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#140730 - 12/18/01 10:22 PM Re: Christmas Cake Recipe from the Zekester
B_b_f_b Offline
You go Zeke with your bad self. Bring the Mrs. down in January and make that cake on the beach, scrap that, let's just do shots on the beach.

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#140731 - 12/19/01 12:44 AM Re: Christmas Cake Recipe from the Zekester
Anonymous
zeke, how ya doin'? happy holidays to you & yours.

we are thinking of AC in late spring, we are off to orlando in january. anyone else due about that time?

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#140732 - 12/19/01 02:57 AM Re: Christmas Cake Recipe from the Zekester
Anonymous
Jane,
When in January will you be in Orlando? I will be there the first weekend for the Gift and Jewelry show. Sure would love to meet you!

Zeke, I agree... lets forget the cake and just do shots!!

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#140733 - 12/19/01 06:26 PM Re: Christmas Cake Recipe from the Zekester
CHOOCHOO Offline
I have spent the past two days trying to make this damn cake. We are now on our 5th try. Thank God the grocery and the the liquor store are only two blocks apart, but it is getting a trifle expensive. I WILL keep at this until we get it right. In the meantime, anybody know where we can get a good used heart and lung machine, maybe even some dialysis equipment?

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#140734 - 12/19/01 09:02 PM Re: Christmas Cake Recipe from the Zekester
Anonymous
vicki - we will be in orlando the 18th thru the 23rd, with the kids. it sounds like you might be in san pedro then???

as i said, i asked frank and he said bz could still be on the books for this year. how often do you go down there?

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#140735 - 12/19/01 10:32 PM Re: Christmas Cake Recipe from the Zekester
Chloe Offline
Choochoo, could it be that turning of the pan 360 degrees, and not falling off is your downfall? Maybe Big Zeke has further instructions for that step in cake baking.
_________________________
Dare To Deviate

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#140736 - 12/19/01 11:50 PM Re: Christmas Cake Recipe from the Zekester
CHOOCHOO Offline
Chloe,

As usual yer a genius. I think that's the point where everything goes to hell. Turning completely around while trying to keep a grasp on that bottle of Vox is no small accomplishment.

If this doesn't work out pretty damn soon I'm going to have to start using a much cheaper vodka, and I have a feelin' that would probably have a negative outcome on the quality of the baked goods. On the other hand, after following these directions...who would know?

Be sure to try the biscuits and sausage gravy, scrambled eggs at the Hideaway.

CC

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#140737 - 12/20/01 02:55 AM Re: Christmas Cake Recipe from the Zekester
Vicki Offline
Jane,
I think we will try to go down in May, then again in September (if the Seminoles schedule holds like the proposed schedule, I would have a short window of opportunity).
Are you doing the whole Disney thing? Cheyenne loved Disney, Universal and especially Sea World. We have a great time share there!
You know that Big Zeke is in St. Augustine, just about an hour and a half from Orlando. It's worth the short drive over, (Zeke has wonderful panty rippers!!) and St. Auggie is a great place too!

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