It was the first day of school in St.Augustine, FL. for a new student
Suzuki, son of a Japanese businessman, was entering the fourth grade
new to America).
At the start of class, the teacher said, Let us begin by reviewing
American History. Who said "Give me Liberty, or give me Death"?
teacher saw a sea of blank faces except for Suzuki, who had his hand
"Patrick Henry, 1775," he said. "Very Good" replied the teacher.
Who said "Government, of the people, by the people, and for the people,
not perish from the earth"? Again no response exept from Suzuki.
Lincoln, 1863," said Suzuki. The teacher snapped at the class,
should be ashamed. Suzuki, who is new to our country, knows more
history than you do." She heard a loud whisper from the middle of the
"Screw the Japanese".
"Who said that?" she demanded. Suzuki put his hand up and said, "Lee
Iacocca, 1982." At that point a student in the back said "I'm gonna
The teacher glares and asks, "All right! Now, who said that?" Again,
Suzuki says , "George Bush, to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991."
sea of students are getting furious, and another students yells, "Oh
Suzuki immediately jumps out of his chair waving his hand, and shouts
teacher, "Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!" Now, with close
mob hysteria developing, someone shouts, "You little shit. If you
anything else, I'll kill you."
Suzuki Frantically yells at the top of his voice, "Gary Condit to
Levy, 2001." The teacher now faints; and as the class gathers around
teacher residing on the floor, someone says, "Oh shit, we're screwed."
Suzuki immediately says, "The Taliban- 2001!"
There is only one cure for baldness. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.