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#143473 - 05/07/02 05:24 PM THE MEN'S RULES.... (just for fun!)
KC Offline
After reading some of the posts here, my husband asked me to post these for him. (He said he thought that Bill Thornton would like them -- funny how we feel we know someone even though we've never met, huh?)
Personally, I think Zeke will also appreciate this.

We always hear "the rules" from the feminine side.
> Ok we now hear the guys' side. These are our rules! Please note ...
> these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
> 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
> down.
> 1. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if
> we can find the perfect present yet again!
> 1. Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with it.
> 1. Do not ask us what we are thinking about unless you are prepared to
> discuss such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, and NASCAR.
> 1. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the
> tides. Let it be.
> 1. Shopping is NOT a sport, and no, we are never going to think of it
> that way.
> 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine.
> Really.
> 1. Crying is blackmail.
> 1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do
> not work. Strong hints do not work. Obvious hints do not work. Just say
> it!
> 1. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a
> calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.
> 1. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd
> be
> any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with
> your dress?
> 1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
> 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's
> what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
> 1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
> 1. Check your oil! Please.
> 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In
> fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
> 1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us
> to act like soap opera guys.
> 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways
> makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
> 1. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.
> 1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done
> - not both.
> If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
> 1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
> commercials.
> 1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.
> 1. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two
> months we were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your
> girlfriends.
> 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach,
> for example,is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no
> idea what mauve is.
> 1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
> 1. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack
> of,mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.
> 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like
> nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the
> hassle.
> 1. I'm in shape. ROUND is a shape.
> 1 Now thats not to hard is it?
"You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think."

#143474 - 05/07/02 06:08 PM Re: THE MEN'S RULES.... (just for fun!)
paluxy Offline
Actually Christopher Columbus did need directions, he made a wrong turn and found America (he was looking for some other land mass i just can't remeber which one!)

Kinda scary to think about....if he had had a woman aboard America might not have happened!!!ha ha
PS>loved the post!

#143475 - 05/08/02 02:20 PM Re: THE MEN'S RULES.... (just for fun!)
mountain Larry Offline
May I add one?

1. Yes, I must have a beer if I'm going to do work around the house.
Thanks, ML

#143476 - 05/08/02 04:33 PM Re: THE MEN'S RULES.... (just for fun!)
NJgirl Offline
Oh I can't resist...

1. Yes, I CAN fit one more thing in the garbage.

#143477 - 05/08/02 05:27 PM Re: THE MEN'S RULES.... (just for fun!)
susangg Offline
Dont forget this:

1. If you want me to speak in words instead of grunts in the morning, get me coffee.
Susan Guberman-Garcia, Attorney at Law. Phone: 510-792-2639
Fax/Voicemail:: 510-405-2016 Email: susangg@garcia.mpowermail.com

#143478 - 05/08/02 05:36 PM Re: THE MEN'S RULES.... (just for fun!)
susangg Offline
Dont forget this:

1. If you want us to speak in words instead of grunts in the morning, get us a cup of coffee.
Susan Guberman-Garcia, Attorney at Law. Phone: 510-792-2639
Fax/Voicemail:: 510-405-2016 Email: susangg@garcia.mpowermail.com

#143479 - 05/08/02 11:27 PM Re: THE MEN'S RULES.... (just for fun!)
Mosquitorose Offline
I loved it! men are really cute you know...lol

Love is a many splendid thing and food runs a close second.


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