Portofino Resort- Now with a new BEACH BAR!!
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#150226 - 03/18/03 07:43 PM The lighter side of things.
KathyMLT Offline
I was waiting at work for an ER and picked up a travel brochure...following are some of excerpts that they apparently had to add as disclaimers. I can't believe people are so stupid as to try to get refunds for the following things..Some of them crack me up....

1. No control can be exercised over airline carriers to guarantee flight schedules which may be altered or affected by various circumstances. Air Transat Holidays cannot be held liable for damages or additional fees incurred by consumers oweing to a missed flight connection, whatever the reason. Darn...if I stayed at the airport bar too long and missed my flight I thought I could compensated for it....

2. Consumers are asked to bear in mind and accept that living standards and local customs, as well as the provision of utilities, services and accomodations may vary from those with which they are familiar at home. DUH

3. The food, water and beverages may not be up to North-American standards. Accordingly, consumers hereby accept personal responsibility for any illness suffered while abroad or upon return to owing to the quality of the food, water and beverages.....bottom line.." don't drink the water...; )

4.This one cracks me up........Insect life thrives in tropical climates and makes no distinction between budget or higher-priced hotel accomodations. Well, I thought those little buggers could read...

5. Consumers may be subject to certain inconveniences, such as cancellations or unavailability of some services, when travelling during periods designated to school breaks, other holidays or conventions. Because these periods vary according to country and relevant authorities, it is practically impossible for Air Transat Holidays to provide any indication of such dates. Consumers hereby recognize and solely accept the possible consequences of travelling during these periods.....Guess people in other countries aren't allowed to have a life if these people are on vacation.

6. Photographs appearing in the brochure should be used soley as an indication and shall not be construed as part of this contract. Consumers are advised to make their selection according to price, location and services offered. Decor and furnishings may vary from room to room. DUH. Guess they should take photos of EVERY room in EVERY hotel.

7. Consumers are responsible for ensuring that they are in adequate physical condition for travel, that they have a sufficient quantity of any required medication with them, and that they carry such medication in their hand baggage......well, this is one way to beat the cost of healthcare..sue the travel agent if you are dumb enough to climb Mt. Everest, have been a couch potato all your life and have a heart attack.

8. This is the real kicker.......Air Transat Holidays cannot be held liable for any delay, loss of personal belongings, injury, accident, mortality, damage, inconveinience, loss of enjoyment, upset, disappointment or frustration, either mental or physical, owing to a force majaure, that is to say, an unforeseeable event suchas as, BUT NOT LIMITED TO the following.....any njustifiable or negligent act or omission on behalf of a service provider or an employee thereof....any illness, theft, dispute, mechanical breakdown, quarantine, war, terrorism, government constraints, civil unrest, POOR WEATHER CONDITIONS, closing or poor state of repair of an access road, or other factors over which no reasonalbe control can be excercised by either Air Transat Holidays or service providers thereof......WELL, I'll never used these people if I can't get my money back if it rains

The scariest thing about the people they obviously had to write this for is that those people procreate.......UGH

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#150227 - 03/18/03 10:22 PM Re: The lighter side of things.
Bobber Offline
And the people this is written for tend to procreate more than the average. :rolleyes:
_________________________
Been there, done that, the washing machine ate the T-shirt

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#150228 - 03/21/03 05:17 AM Re: The lighter side of things.
Danl & the Boop Offline
Hi Kathy;
Here are a few more instructions I'm not too sure about :rolleyes:

1. On Sears hairdryer:
"Do not use while sleeping."
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair)

2. On a bag of Fritos:
"You could be winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside."
(Evidently, the shoplifter special)

3. On a bar of Dial soap:
"Directions: Use like regular soap."
(And that would be how. . . ?)

4. On some Swanson frozen dinners:
"Serving suggestions: Defrost."
(But it's *just* a suggestion)

5. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of box):
Don't turn upside-down
(Oops, too late!)

6. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
"Product will be hot after heating."
(As night follows the day . . . .)

7. On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
"Do not iron clothes on body."
(But wouldn't this save even more time?)

9. On Nytol Sleep Aid:
"Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(One would hope)

10. On most brands of Christmas lights:
"For indoor or outdoor use only."
(As opposed to what?)

11. On a Japanese food processor:
"Not to be used for the other use."
(I gotta admit, I'm curious.)

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#150229 - 03/21/03 05:26 AM Re: The lighter side of things.
dbdoberman Offline
Good one! hahaha! laugh

If the food processor takes batteries, ask NYGal, and the other ladies what that other use is.... wink

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#150230 - 03/21/03 05:34 AM Re: The lighter side of things.
Danl & the Boop Offline
Not on your life shocked shocked

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#150231 - 03/21/03 05:36 AM Re: The lighter side of things.
dbdoberman Offline
that cracked me up! hahahaha! laugh

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#150232 - 03/21/03 05:39 AM Re: The lighter side of things.
KathyMLT Offline
Kinda scarey isn't it..I admit I'm curious about the food processor thing too ; 0
Ooops the coffee is hot, better sue McDonalds....

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#150233 - 03/21/03 06:35 AM Re: The lighter side of things.
Rapier Offline
NO ...... The Scariest part is that they obviously HAD to write these down for people because somewhere some dumbass lawyer actually took a case from a client where he/she thought they could win using these excuses !

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#150234 - 03/21/03 04:10 PM Re: The lighter side of things.
KathyMLT Offline
So true......the insect one still cracks me up. People just amaze me. sometimes I think that there is some sort of idiot gas that has been shot over us...some of us are immune to it but many are not.

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#150235 - 03/21/03 07:19 PM Re: The lighter side of things.
Debbie Offline
Many of these companies are big enough to devote entire departments in advertising etc. to these type of details..... with degreed people making 6 figure incomes at the top....Boggles the mind.
:rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:
Debbie

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