It's sure quiet on here.
Did something happen and I don't know it?

I have read every paper, watched every television channel. ( I am pretty good at that now, I surf just like the best of the guys now !)
I've done the 'google' thing, wished for fritters, gave up dancing, watched the snow come and go, temperatures elevate and decline( Again ).
Did I come to the end of the "things" to do?

Yikes, that's frightening.

The female skier Picabo Street (pronounced Peek-A-Boo)

The famous Olympic skier Picabo Street is not just an athlete, she is a nurse.

She currently works at the Intensive Care Unit of a large metropolitan hospital.

She is not permitted to answer the telephone, however, as it caused simply too much confusion when she would answer the phone and say, Picabo, ICU.

"Doc," said the husband, "I got nine kids and the wife's expecting again. How do I stop the stork?"

The doctor replied, "Shoot it in the air!"

Hurry!

The old professor was trying to demonstrate a project on his computer to four coeds helping him edit a newsletter. He was having problems with the computer, so the ladies went over to the lounge until he could get the program pulled up.

The Dean was a little shocked when he walked in the door and heard one of the coeds shouting down the hallway, "Hurry up and get in here, girls, the old professor finally got it up!"

A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. All of a sudden, he said out loud, "Lord, grant me one wish."
The sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish."
The man said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime I want."
The Lord said, "Your request is very materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of another wish, a wish you think would honor and glorify me."
The man thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know how they feel inside, what they are thinking when they give the silent treatment, why they cry, what they mean when they say 'nothing', and how I can make a woman truly happy."
The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four lanes on that bridge?"

Good job...keep em rolling.

Okay, ya ready!!

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the other side.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahhaaha

That is the only one I know.

Jackie

Over drinks one afternoon a buddy of mine and I were discussing former "loves". I told him that I once broke-up with a girl long ago because she had a seemingly incurable speech impediment.

George said, "Jimmy, I'm shocked. I never knew you to be one to be prejudiced against handicaps. What was the girl's problem?"

Taking a sip, I paused and reflected. "She couldn't say 'yes'."

IRAQI BINGO

B-1
F-16
B-52
A-10

C-130
BINGO!