I was away from my computer attending the public hearing on the new proposed development – TVNB/ Tent Village North Beach. The developer took time away from his duties at the Chamber of Commerce to extol the virtues of the new project. He said it would keep in theme with BTB’s slogan – Come to Ambergris Caye, where no development is too big or too small, as you will see.
He told of how the project is strategically placed to give the tent people an unobstructed view of and within easy walking distance to the casino boat assuring its successes based on the disposable income of tent people and their propensity to gamble as demonstrated by their sleeping on the ground with snakes and scorpions.
He went on to assure he would oppose any efforts by Scubaldy to start a gamblers anonymous chapter assuring AC’s reputation remains intact as a ideal place to locate for people with addictions like alcohol and drugs or legal problems in their country of origin.
He then handed out copies of and directed our attention to page 723 of the 1963 page EIA study noting their findings that the maximum population density of the island as established by the strict AC Master Plan based on current infrastructure would not be exceeded citing the bylaws of the subdivision where the tents were restricted to one story.
The study further noted that there would be no additional demand of the municipal sewage system as the tent people would not be hooked up to it as they would use their own technologically advanced methods. This system would also ensure there would be no health hazard from sewage or garbage on the immediate property that the tents are on because of their system utilizing NIMBY further enhanced by their own IMNBY – In My Neighbor’s Back Yard.
There was a vocal group from Reef Village protesting based on declining property values and ecological concerns, specifically dredging and removal of mangroves. The developer again pointed to the bylaws requiring the tents to be constructed of modern, aesthetically attractive materials. He then pointed out there would be no need for additional dredging as what had been done to accommodate Reef Village was sufficient to accommodate the new development. He noted that he was aware of more dredging for a proposed boat city to be built in front of TVNB and would oppose that based on boat people not being good neighbors and prone to untie their boats and leave on a moments notice.
He then reminded us that tent people have the reputation of protecting mangroves, as they are necessary for attaching tent ropes earning tent people the affectionate nickname “Mangrove Tuggers”.
After the presentation most people left very up beat chanting the words to Viva AC except I who keeps confusing the words with another Viva song and Pedro1 who was depressed having to change his web site to no longer claiming to be the “Cheapest Dump on AC. Efforts were made to console Charlie, but Pedro garnered no sympathy.
On a more light and humorous note, there will be a parody of the meeting on the upcoming episode of “As The Island Turns”.
Gilligan is cast as the Developer, Boss Hog as Jeff Pierce and Mo Larry & Curly as the RV protesters. Don’t miss it.