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#148001 01/31/03 09:40 AM
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 734
JmHanna Offline OP
OP Offline
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra than Alzheimers research. This means that by 2020, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.


Jim
#148002 01/31/03 09:47 AM
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 31
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What do you call a cow thats birthed a baby?

Decalfinated.

#148003 01/31/03 10:20 AM
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 264
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Have you ever tried Dragon milk?
confused confused confused
It comes from cows with short legs.
:rolleyes: laugh mad

Dan'l

#148004 01/31/03 11:57 AM
Joined: May 2001
Posts: 476
C
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C
What kind of bee makes milk instead of honey?

a boo bee...

#148005 01/31/03 06:20 PM
Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 36
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If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

Why are they called 'stands' when they're made for sitting?

Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?

Why do 'tug' boats push their barges?

Why does flammable and inflammable mean the same thing?

Why is it called 'after dark', when it is really after light?

Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?

Why is Mickey Mouse bigger than his dog Pluto?

Can fat people go skinny-dipping?

Why does your nose run and your feet smell?

Why does the sun lighten our hair, but darken our skin?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your a*s?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

If money is the root of all evil, then how come churches ask for it?

Can vampires donate blood?

Why is Bra singular and Panties plural?

How can someone be dirt poor, and another be filthy rich?

You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing.


Reality is due to lack of alcohol
#148006 01/31/03 07:36 PM
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 2,976
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Hey Jim!!!! How are you and family??? Good i hope!!! See ya soon!! wink wink Congrats on the Palapa!!! C

#148007 01/31/03 09:35 PM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 114
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Why do you Drive on a Parkway and Park on a Driveway? :rolleyes:

This could go on forever :p

#148008 02/01/03 07:38 PM
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 761
Offline
A redneck goes to a pharmacist and says: "I got a hot date tonight, an' I need me some pertection. How much is a pack a' dem rubbers gonna cost me?"

The pharmacist responds: "A three-pack of condoms is $4.99 with tax."

To which the redneck replies: "TACKS! Gawd a' mighty, don't they stay on by themselves."


There is only one cure for baldness. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.

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