New Jerseyites try to turn on the heat.
People in MN plant gardens
Californians shiver uncontrollably
People in MN sunbathe
Italian and English cars won't start
People in MN drive with the windows down
Distilled water freezes
Lake Mille Lacs water gets thicker
Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves and woolly hats.
People in MN throw on a flannel shirt
Philadelphia landlords finally turn up the heat
People in MN have the last cookout before it gets too cold.
People in Miami all die
Minnesotans lick the flagpole
Iowans fly away to Mexico
People in MN get out their winter coats
The Girl Scouts in MN are selling cookies door to door
Polar bears begin to evacuate the Arctic
MN Boy Scouts postpone "winter Survival" classes until it gets cold enough
Mt. St. Helen's freezes
People in MN rent some videos
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole
Minnesotans get frustrated because they can't thaw the keg
Microbial life no longer survives on dairy products
Cows in MN complain about farmers with cold hands
All atomic motion stops (absolute zero on the Kelvin Scale)
People in MN start saying "cold nuff for ya?"
Hell freezes over
The Minnesota Vikings win the Super Bowl