Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 761
OP Offline
Zeke had just gotten back from his AC visit with the infamous Susie. Mrs. Zeke who of course missed her loving husband tremendously just had to sneak off to visit a fortune teller of some local
repute. She just had to find out why her loving hubby always went to AC without her. She knew he loved to fish,snorkle, and indulge in a alcoholic beverage or TWO but why oh why could she never join him in his visit to Temptation Island? In a dark and hazy room, peering into a crystal ball, the mystic delivered the terrible grave news.

"There's no easy way to say this, so I'll just be blunt: Prepare yourself to be a widow. Your
husband will die a violent and horrible death this year."

Visibly shaken, Mrs. Zeke stared at the woman's lined face, then at the single flickering candle,
then down at her hands. She took a few deep breaths to compose herself. She simply had to
know. She met the fortune teller's gaze, steadied her voice, and asked her question.

"Will I be acquitted?"


There is only one cure for baldness. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.
A
Anonymous
Anonymous
A
LOL!! had to say, zeke, i saw it coming!! missed you.

Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 761
OP Offline
How to keep a women?

Give her lots of attention.

Tell her how beautiful she is.

Show her that she is very important.

Spend lot's of money on them.

Let her think that she own's you.

Help her shop for shoe's (even if it's for three hour's)

Give her the respect that a lady should get.

How to keep a man happy?

Come on time.

Come naked.

And with at least a 12 pack.


There is only one cure for baldness. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 2,090
Offline
Does Mrs Zeke read your posts??? LOL

Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 761
OP Offline
Deb....Mum is the word at your birthday party. After over twenty years I guess you can figure out by now that Mrs. Zeke has a sense of humor also.She has four kids and I have three. Any ideas on who her fourth might be?


There is only one cure for baldness. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 761
OP Offline
Survivor

There was a cruise ship going through some rough waters that ended up sinking just off the coast of a small deserted island.


There where only 3 survivors: 2 guys and a girl. They lived there for a couple of years doing what was natural for men and women.


After several years of casual sex all the time, the girl felt really bad about what she had been doing. She felt having sex with both guys was so bad that she killed herself.


It was very tragic but the two guys managed to get through it and after a while nature once more took it's inevitable course.


Well, a couple more years went by and the guys began to feel absolutely horrible about what they were doing.
>
>
>
>
>
>
>So................
>
>
>.
>
>
>.
>They buried her.


There is only one cure for baldness. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 761
OP Offline
Moral of The Story

There was a fly flying 6 inches above a lake.

A fish in the lake thinks,

"If that fly dropped 6 inches I'd get it!"

A bear on land thinks, "If that fly dropped 6 inches,
the fish would jump out of the water, and I'd get it!"

A hunter thinks, "If that fly drops 6 inches, the fish
would jump, the bear will go to get the fish, and I'll
shoot the bear"

A mouse thinks, "If that fly drops 6 inches, the fish
would jump, the bear would go to get the fish, the
hunter will go to get the bear, and I'll steal the
cheese off his sandwich!"

A cat thinks, "If that fly drops 6 inches, the fish
would jump, the bear would go to get the fish, the
hunter will go to get the bear, the mouse will go get
the cheese, and I'll get that mouse!!!"

Suddenly, it all happened:

The fly dropped 6 inches, the fish got the fly, the
bear got the fish, the hunter got the bear, the mouse got the hunter's cheese, but the cat missed the mouse and fell in the water!!!!!

The Moral Of This Story Is..................

"Every time a fly drops 6 inches, a pussy gets wet!!!"


There is only one cure for baldness. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 761
OP Offline
Little Johnny's mom asked little Johnny if he had enjoyed the
field trip. "Yes it was great - we saw sheep, horses, goats, and
[#%!]."

Mom: "Er, fine, fine. I know what the sheep and the rest are, but
what is a [#%!]?"

Johnny: "Oh, they're the animals that give us milk and steaks"
Mom: "But who said they were called, er, [#%!]?"

Johnny: "That was our teacher. Well actually she called them
'effers,' but we all knew what she meant.


There is only one cure for baldness. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.
A
Anonymous
Anonymous
A
the last to are just so-so, but the survivor one...I AM HOWLING!!!!!


Link Copied to Clipboard
March
S M T W T F S
1 2
3 4 5 6 7 8 9
10 11 12 13 14 15 16
17 18 19 20 21 22 23
24 25 26 27 28 29 30
31
Cayo Espanto
Click for Cayo Espanto, and have your own private island
More Links
Click for exciting and adventurous tours of Belize with Katie Valk!
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 294 guests, and 0 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Statistics
Forums44
Topics79,199
Posts500,011
Members20,460
Most Online7,413
Nov 7th, 2021



AmbergrisCaye.com CayeCaulker.org HELP! Visitor Center Goods & Services San Pedro Town
BelizeSearch.com Message Board Lodging Diving Fishing Things to Do History
BelizeNews.com Maps Phonebook Belize Business Directory
BelizeCards.com Picture of the Day

The opinions and views expressed on this board are the subjective opinions of Ambergris Caye Message Board members
and not of the Ambergris Caye Message Board its affiliates, or its employees.

Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5