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#135808 04/26/01 08:02 AM
Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 431
OP Offline
Just a little joke a friend from Texas sent me. Interesting......LOL

The following is an actual exam question given on a University of Washington
chemistry mid term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the
professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course,
why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law, (gas
cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or some
variant. One student, however, wrote the following:

"First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need
to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are
leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it
will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are
entering Hell, lets look at the different religions that exist in the world
today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their
religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these
religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can
project that most souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are,
we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.

Now,we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law
states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter
Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell
breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell,
then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my
Freshman year, "...that it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with
you.", and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in
having that event take place, then, #2 cannot be true, and thus I am sure
that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze."
**The student received the only "A" given.

#135809 04/26/01 10:50 AM
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 4,268
LOL... funny, funny, funny stuff...

#135810 04/26/01 12:40 PM
hey ss. this is very good. and i actually understood it too! this student shows both intellegence & humor, not to mention a knack for tying it together. the A was deserved.

very funny.

#135811 05/03/01 01:14 AM
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 387
this is just too excellent to pass up... and i know just the right person i've got to forward this on to!!! too funny....

#135812 05/09/01 06:44 PM
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 5,563
My high school chemistry teacher was a little off. He constantly left we students experimenting with chemicals we knew nothing about. One day he came in and asked me what was in my beaker on the Bunson burner, as he picked it up. Just as I was telling him, one drop of water ran over to the gray stuff and it blew up.
After that I wanted to drop the class. He wouldn't let me. He said the only way I could get out of his class was to flunk out.
So, on the mid term exam, which was 100 questions the only one I answered was "What is the name of the machine that crushes atoms." (This was 1953) I wrote "Atomizer"
He gave me a "C"

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