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Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 431
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Just couldn't help myself....just had to post this! [Linked Image]

The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a
surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was
to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The man should
be here soon".

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer
rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.


"Good morning madam. I've come to...."


"Oh, no need to explain. I've been expecting you," Mrs. Smith cut in.


"Really?" the photographer asked. "Well, good! I've made a specialty of
babies."


"That's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a
seat."


After a moment she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?"


"Leave everything ! to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the
couch and perhaps a couple on the bed. Sometimes the living room floor
is fun too; you can really spread out!"


"Bathtub and living room floor? No wonder it didn't work for Harry and
me."


"Well, madam, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we
try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles,
I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results."


"My, that's a lot of ..." gasped Mrs. Smith.


"Madam, in my line of work, a man must take his time. I'd love to be in
and out in five minutes, but you'd be disappointed with that, I'm sure."


"Don't I know it.", Mrs. Smith said quietly.


The photographer opened his! briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his
baby pictures. "This was done on the top of a bus in downtown London."


"Oh my God!!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, tugging at her handkerchief.
"And these twins turned out exceptionally well-when you consider their
mother was so difficult to work with."


"She was difficult ?" asked Mrs. Smith.


"Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to Hyde Park to get the
job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep, pushing
to get a good look."


"Four and five deep?" asked Mrs. Smith, eyes widened in amazement.


"Yes", the photographer said. "And for more than three hours, too. The
mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly
concentrate. Then darkness approached and I began to rush my shots.
Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just
packed it all in."


Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "You mean they actually chewed on your,
um...equipment?"


"That's right. Well madam, if you're ready, I'll set up my tripod so
that we can get to work."


"Tripod??!"

"Oh yes, I have to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big
for me to hold very long. Madam? Madam? Good Lord, she's fainted!"

Joined: May 2000
Posts: 2,090
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Touche Sis!!! That WAS a good one!! *grinning*

Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 4,268
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LOL! I'm still laughing! Very good sandshaker!

Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 555
M
Offline
M
Good One!

Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 1,205
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WAY TOO FUNNY TAMMY...


Life May Be a Beach...I prefer Reefs...
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 7,059
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Yeah! It is funny, but since you have so much time on your hands, email your MOM a letter. LOL......Just kidding.


Dare To Deviate
Joined: Jul 2001
Posts: 0
S
Offline
S
Great One Tammy! Miss seeing you on the board.


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