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#138528 09/18/01 02:09 PM
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 8
Johnnie Offline OP
OP Offline
September 12, 2001

Dear Osama Bin Laden, Yasser Arafat, and Sadam Hussein, et. al.,

We are pleased to announce that we unequivocally accept your challenge to an old-fashioned game of whoop-ass. Now that we understand the rule that there are no rules, we look forward to playing by them for the first time.

Since this game is a winner-take-all, we unfortunately are unable to invite you to join us at the victory celebration. But rest assured that we will toast you -- LITERALLY.

While we will admit that you are off to an impressive lead, it is, however, now our turn at the plate.

By the way, we will be playing on your diamond now.

Batter up.

Our team line up is:

Manager ~ George W. Bush
Head Coach ~ Colin Powell
Assistant Coach ~ D. Rumsfeld
Starting Pitcher ~ Lead off hitter...Norman Schwartzkoff
1st Base ~ Marine Corps.....Air and Ground
2nd Base ~ U S Navy Air Wing...Ships don't work well in sand
Shortstop and clean up hitter. ~ U S Air Force
3rd Base and Outfield. ~ Combined U S Forces of military
And pinch hitters as needed ~ Navy SEALS, Army Special Forces, Delta Force

You may choose whoever you want for your team . . . It ain't gonna matter.

Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 28
You don't even need a referee.

Joined: May 2000
Posts: 2,090
And what a cheerleading squad this team will have!!!!!!!!!!

Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 683
Love this post.

Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 1,080
KC Offline
Becky -- Can you e-mail me? I have something I'd like to forward to you... I think you will enjoy it. [Linked Image]

[email protected]

"You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think."
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 8
Johnnie Offline OP
OP Offline
Every U down in Uville liked the U.S. a lot,
But the Binch, who lived Far East of Uville, did not.
The Binch hated U.S! The whole U.S. way!
Now don't ask me why, for nobody can say,
It could be his turban was screwed on too tight.
Or the sun from the desert had beaten too bright
But I think that the most likely reason of all
May have been that his heart was two sizes too small.

But, Whatever the reason, his heart or his turban,
He stood facing Uville, the part that was urban.
"They're doing their business," he snarled from his perch.
"They're raising their families! They're going to church!
They're leading the world, and their empire is thriving,
I MUST keep the S's and U's from surviving!"

Tomorrow, he knew, all the U's and the S's,
Would put on their pants and their shirts and their dresses,
They'd go to their offices, playgrounds and schools,
And abide by their U and S values and rules,

And then they'd do something he liked least of all,
Every U down in U-ville, the tall and the small,
Would stand all united, each U and each S,
And they'd sing Uville's anthem, "God bless us! God bless!"
All around their Twin Towers of Uville, they'd stand,
and their voices would drown every sound in the land.

"I must stop that singing," Binch said with a smirk,
And he had an idea--an idea that might work!
The Binch stole some U airplanes in U morning hours,
And crashed them right into the Uville Twin Towers.
"They'll wake to disaster!" he snickered, so sour,
"And how can they sing when they can't find a tower?"

The Binch cocked his ear as they woke from their sleeping,
All set to enjoy their U-wailing and weeping,
Instead he heard something that started quite low,
And it built up quite slow, but it started to grow--
And the Binch heard the most unpredictable thing...
And he couldn't believe it--they started to sing!

He stared down at U-ville, not trusting his eyes,
What he saw was a shocking, disgusting surprise!
Every U down in U-ville, the tall and the small,
Was singing! Without any towers at all!
He HADN'T stopped U-Ville from singing! It sung!
For down deep in the hearts of the old and the young,
Those Twin Towers were standing, called Hope and called Pride,
And you can't smash the towers we hold deep inside.

So we circle the sites where our heroes did fall,
With a hand in each hand of the tall and the small,
And we mourn for our losses while knowing we'll cope,
For we still have inside that U-Pride and U-Hope.

For America means a bit more than tall towers,
It means more than wealth or political powers,
It's more than our enemies ever could guess,
So may God bless America! Bless us! God bless!

Joined: May 2001
Posts: 322
Johnnie - you are TOO COOL. Baseball and Dr. Suess... gotta love it. Thanks!!!

Joined: May 2000
Posts: 2,090
I fell in love with this too. I got it via email this morning and emailed it to all the "mommies" I know who could relate. Thought it might be a creative way to explain all this BS to our little ones....They are so confused, and this is cute and their level. It's perfect.

Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 680
Hell, it's on MY level too!!!!

Joined: May 2000
Posts: 2,090
Yes, my dear sweet Pirate.... There is a child lost inside us all...... [Linked Image]

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