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Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 991
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I heard that if you haven't grown up by the time you reach 50, then you don't have to. Is it true? Do I hafta?
Live so that when you arise in the A.M, Satan shudders & says.. 'Oh sh t..she's awake!'
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 3,677
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50 is the new 40. Stay away from polyester pants, don't drive a Buick with its left turn signal constantly on and the fates will pass you by.
Been there, done that, the washing machine ate the T-shirt
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 2,366
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"2nd star on the right, straight on till morning". Always go home that way and you will never be old.
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 2,366
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The quote was Peter Pan
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Joined: Nov 2001
Posts: 2,364
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25 SIGNS YOU HAVE GROWN UP 1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them. 2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question. 3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge. 4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed. 5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator. 6. You watch the Weather Channel. 7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up." 8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14. 9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up." 10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door won't turn down the stereo. 11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you. 12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore. 13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up. 14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers. 15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt. 16. You take naps. 17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one. 18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach. 19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests. 20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good shit." 21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time. 22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to drink that much again." 23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work. 24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar. 25. When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them instead of asking "Oh shit what the hell happened?" Bonus: 26: You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old ass.
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Joined: Jan 2001
Posts: 2,133
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I am living proof that you don't hafta do anything that you don't wanna do after 50 I hope I never grow up that much!
Gela's AC Motto: "All Roads Used to Lead to BC's - Now They Lead to Hurricane's!"
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Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 345
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The "grown-up" list REALLY made my 23-yr-old laugh. Me too. Mr. Change refused comment. On the other hand, I found 50 to be an excellent year, when I went to Paris, learned SCUBA, discovered my ardent love for Belize and realized that what other people think of me is absolutely none of my business.
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Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 5,563
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At 50 I went back to my maiden name and entered the most romantic and sizzling love affair of my life. At 56 I got my SCUBA certification and started making trips to exotic places. At 60 I dyed my hair red, bought a red convertible and said I was looking for a husband and this time I didn't want it to be someone else's. At 61 I came to Belize in time to be evacuated for Hurricane Mitch and just kept coming back. At 65 I moved here . . . and lived happily ever after.
Harriette Take only pictures leave only bubbles
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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 264
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I wrote this for a friends Fiftith birthday.
HOW DO YOU KNOW WHEN YOU'VE TURNED FIFTY? When your belt size keeps getting larger When you moan every time you bend over When you speak of the Kinks, you're no longer speaking of a rock group When your back goes out more than you do When you have more laugh lines than it's possibly funny When you notice more hair in the sink than on your head When you consistently forget to turn off your left-hand directional signal When your arms aren't long enough to read the menu When it's easier to tell the Doctor what's not hurting, than what is hurting When the only exercise you get is walking to the golf cart When talking of getting lucky, you're referring to your golf game When you refer to Thirty year olds as kids When you flirt with chicks at a bar & they tell you, you remind them of their father When you attend your high school reunion and everyone there looks like your parents When your children are studying in history what you've lived through When everyone you know, you call Buddy, because you can't remember their name When every day you take nearly the entire alphabet of vitamins When you start receiving mail from AARP When the host at the restaurant asks to see your senior citizen discount card When Social Security notifies you of what you have to retire on is less than what you made when first started to work When you look in the mirror and you've still got it Kid!
ArtZ SmartZ
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 2,366
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Too crule. But funny
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