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again, totally off the subject...

Posted By: Anonymous

again, totally off the subject... - 11/29/01 05:13 PM

unlike zeke, i cannot take credit for this. it was sent to me, but reflects my life to a "t" -

I have recently been diagnosed with AAADD: Age Activated Attention Deficit
> Disorder
> This is how it goes...
>
>
> I decide to wash the car and start toward the garage when I notice the
> mail on the table. I figure I might as well go through the mail before
> washing the car. I lay my keys down on the desk, sort the mail and
> discard the junk mail. As I discard the junk mail, I see that the garbage
> can is full.
> I lay the bills down on the desk and pick up the trashcan. Then I figure
> that since I'll be going near the mailbox while taking out the trash, I
> may as well pay these few bills first. Now where did I put my checkbook?
> Ah, here it is! Oops, there's only one check left. My extra checks are in
> the other room. Oh! There's the soda I was drinking earlier! Hmmm, I guess
> I'd better take it out to the kitchen and discard it.
> On the way to the kitchen, my flower arrangement catches my eye and I
> realize it needs more water. I pour the soda down the sink. As I wipe a
> spot off the counter I see my glasses on the windowsill. It's about
> time. I've been looking for them all morning! I guess I'd better go put
> them away so I can find them again later. But...
> first I've got to add water to the flower arrangement... Hey! What's the
> TV remote doing in the kitchen? Aaaaaagh! I'd better take it to the living
> room because we'll never think to look for it in the kitchen
> tonight.
> I take the remote out to the coffee table and find that the living room is
> a bit untidy, so I go around arranging cushions and throw pillows. Then
> I'm off down the hall, to... to... what the heck was I planning to do?
> End of Day: The car isn't washed, the bills are unpaid, the flowers aren't
> watered, the checkbook still only has one check, and now I can't seem to
> find my car keys! I don't seem to have gotten anything done today, but I
> just can't figure out why because I KNOW I WAS BUSY ALL DAY LONG!!!
Posted By: Anonymous

Re: again, totally off the subject... - 11/29/01 05:21 PM

this one is just to think about. i count my blessings every day.

*************************************
If we could shrink the earth's population to a village of precisely 100 people, with all the existing human ratios remaining the same, it would look something like the following:
There would be:
> >> 57 Asians
> >> 21 Europeans
> >> 14 from the Western Hemisphere, both north and south
> >> 8 Africans
> >> 52 would be female
> >> 48 would be male
> >>
> >> 70 would be non-white
> >> 30 would be white
> >>
> >> 70 would be non-Christian
> >> 30 would be Christian
> >>
> >> 89 would be heterosexual
> >> 11 would be homosexual
> >>
> >> 6 people would possess 59% of the entire world's wealth and all
> >> 6 would be from the United States.
> >>
> >> 80 would live in substandard housing
> >> 70 would be unable to read
> >> 50 would suffer from malnutrition
> >> 1 would be near death; 1 would be near birth
> >> 1 (yes, only 1) would have a college education
> >> 1 would own a computer
> >>


[This message has been edited by janeinPA (edited 11-30-2001).]
Posted By: Laguna Punta

Re: again, totally off the subject... - 11/30/01 12:16 AM

Hi Jane: Amen!, Jane, to the first one. Can't remember the second one, I was still thinking about the first. Take care: Bill
Posted By: Anonymous

Re: again, totally off the subject... - 11/30/01 09:50 PM

my friend has WAY too much time:

A Woman's Random Thoughts...
>
> I read this article that said
> the typical symptoms of stress
> are eating too much, drinking
> too much, impulse buying and
> driving too fast.
> Are they kidding? That is my
> idea of a perfect day.
>
> >
> A friend of mine confused her
> valium with her birth control
> pills. She had 14 kids, but
> she doesn't give a darn.
>
> They keep telling us to get in
> touch with our bodies. Mine
> isn't all that communicative
> but I heard from it the other
> day after I said, "Body, how'd
> you like to go to the six
> o'clock class in vigorous
> toning?" Clear as a bell my
> body said, "listen [email protected]#&h...do
> it and you die."
>
> The trouble with some women is
> that they get all excited
> about nothing, and then they
> marry him.
>
> I know what Victoria's Secret
> is. The secret is that nobody
> older than 30 can fit into
> their stuff.
>
> "If men can run the world, why
> can't they stop wearing
> neckties?
> How intelligent is it to start
> the day by tying a noose
> around your neck?"
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