Wolfe's Woofer - by Dennis Wolfe

The Island Newspaper, Ambergris Caye, Belize            Vol. 12, No. 48            December 12, 2002

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Surprise Christmas Party

    "What does Charlene mean when she calls this a Christmas surprise party?"

    "I don't know," Dale said. "How about you, Larry? Do you have any idea what's going on?"

    "Carol didn't tell me anything," Larry said. "Dan, do you know?"

    "No. Eileen just said to be here before nine."

    As we walked down the beach toward BC's Beach Bar and Bar-B-Q we could already hear the noise from the party. Bruce, who was manning the door, met us at the beachside bar entrance.

    "All right mates," he said. "This is supposed to be a Christmas surprise party. The surprise is that to get in you must be either carrying or wearing something that pertains to Christmas."

    "Hey, nobody said anything to us about that," Dan said.

    "Them's the rules, mate. Charlene's rules."

    Charlene walked over to check on us.

    "What's going on?"

    "We have a bunch of guys here who claim they didn't know they had to bring or wear something pertaining to Christmas."      

    "Hey, I'm wearing this red and green shirt," Dan said. "And Eileen always dresses like a Christmas tree. Does that count?"

    "I guess so," Charlene said. "You can go in."

    Dale, who thinks quickly, whipped out a cigarette lighter, lit it and held it up.

    "How about this, then?" he asked.

    "What is that supposed to be?"

    "A Christmas candle."

    "Oh, go on in."

    I grabbed my keys out of my pocket and started jingling them.

    "These are bells," I told her. "Christmas bells."

    "OK. You can go in."

    Larry fumbled around in his pocket, pulled out a pair of ladies underwear and held them up.

    "What is that supposed to be?" Charlene asked.

    "These are Carols'."

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