Dr. Love

El Doctor Amor

Dr. Love is the island's greatest authority on just about everything. Dr. Love answers questions about love, life, relationships, and various other things that people just don't get. The doctor does not address questions about politics or religious issues.

You may write to the Doctor at P.O. Box 35, San Pedro Town, Belize, fax 026-2905 or E-mail at sanpdrosun@btl.net.

Dear Doctor Love,
What makes the world go round?

/s/ Granny J.

Dear Granny,
The earth actually goes around in two ways. Revolution is the motion of the earth in its yearly orbit around the sun. Rotation is the spinning of the earth around its own axis each day. Scientists would have us believe that the force of gravity causes the spinning but the Doctor knows the real explanation. The earth is round and sitting out in space. Have you ever seen a person rolling a log in the water by standing on it and moving their feet? Or a gerbil running on an exercise wheel? The earth is the same way. More than 5 billion people live on this earth and half of them are in daylight while the other half are in night. A lot of those in daylight are walking or driving their cars. This motion keeps the earth turning, just like the gerbil on the exercise wheel. If they all stopped at one time, the earth's rotation would grind to a halt.

Dear Doctor,
What do you think of the concern of some of the world's top thinkers about the millennium crisis for computers? Will it really be the catastrophe that some people predict? What should I do to prepare for it?

/s/ Not a Compu-Nerd

Dear No-Nerd,
The Doctor sees thousands of print and electronic journalists running around looking for an article to write. The people who will be affected by the date glitch on computers will have their part of the problem taken care of when that clock rolls over to mark the year 2000. They have too much at stake to sit by without taking care of business. In the meantime thousands of trees will be sacrificed for paper so that writers can stir up what they hope will be a controversy.

This is not a catastrophe. Hurricane Mitch was a catastrophe. An avalanche in Colorado that kills a lot of people is a catastrophe. A thermonuclear blast is a catastrophe. On January 1, 2000 this old globe will still be rolling over and night will still follow day.

Dear Doc,
I have been reading with interest your column for the past year but as yet I have been unable to decipher what sexuality you are. I keep trying to determine your sex based on your responses but it seems like I am getting nowhere close to solving this enigma. I would be ever so grateful if you could tell me what sex you are.

/s/ Curious Reader

Dear Curious,
The Doctor has certain readers with whom a close personal bond has been formed over the years. These are people who can ask for and receive a personal visit from the Doctor (providing of course that travel expenses are paid along with an appropriate tithe.) This group includes certain heads of state and industry CEO's. For example, last week's trip to Mexico was funded by the Vatican. Do you think the Pope dreams up all of those things to say all by himself? Of course not. Thanks to some good advice from someone we all know and care about the Pope was not at a loss for something to say to those hordes of Mexicans. The point is that be cause of the personal visits these people have a reason to know the Doctor's gender. To the readers it is best not to know. Then the Doctor can be anything their imagination requires.
Dear Doctor Love,
A real estate agency in Belize is offering some land for sale on Ambergris Caye. It is a fairly large tract and the price is one that I can live with. My problem is that my business does not allow me to get away from the U.S. for another three or four months but I don't want to lose out on a really good deal. Is there a reputable photographer that I can hire to take a picture of the property for me? I would certainly appreciate anything you can do for me about this.

/s/ Stan

Dear Stan,
For any large tract of land on Ambergris Caye at what sounds to be a reasonable price, the Doctor recommends Joe Miller Underwater Photography. You're going to need a photographer who is wearing a scuba tank, fins and carrying a waterproof camera. Visit the property by boat and you will probably be able to ride around the property line.

Dear Doctor,
I have been married for two years and I still can not get used to married life. My husband would be with me twenty-four hours a day if I would let him but it drives me nuts to be around someone that much. He is not jealous or anything like that but he just likes to be close to me. I need a chance to be alone. I want my own friends, not the ones that he picks for me. I love my husband but I need to make him understand that sometimes I just want to be left alone. How can I do this without hurting his feelings?

/s/ Loner

Dear Loner,
You can't. It is best to just be direct and tell him how you feel. It may hurt his feelings a little bit but explain to him that everyone is different. Be careful how you do it though. One reader wrote in to the Doctor about a similar problem. On the Doctor's advice the reader told his wife he needed more space. She locked him out of the house.

Dear Dr. Love,
I saw a television show the other day on Channel 25 or 26. It was one of those teeny-bopper shows about kids in high school or college. One of the characters was a radio station personality called Doctor Love. I was wondering if it was you or perhaps one of your relatives. Please enlighten me.

/s/ Faithful Reader

Dear Faithful,
What you saw was a cheap imitator. Like Elvis, the Doctor has been plagued by imitators throughout a career spanning two decades. Only the San Pedro Sun has the real Doctor.

Dr. Love

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