AmbergrisCaye.com Home Forums Talk Belize Chat Area Joke Thread

A cowboy traveling cross country stops at a farm. He asks the farmer if he can talk to the farmer's dog. The farmer says "Sure, but he can't talk back."

The cowboy asks the dog how he likes it on the farm and the dog answers right back in perfect english "Hey, it's great, I get fed twice a day, have the run of the farm, get a walk every night, and if it rains I get to sleep inside...it's great!"

The farmer is blown away. He can't believe his dog can talk. The cowboy then asks the farmer if
he can talk to his horse, the farmer says "Sure, I've never seen him talk, but you're welcome to try."

The cowboy asks the horse how he likes it on the farm and the horse says, again in perfect english, "It's wonderful, I get a feedbag every day, have the run of the pasture and a great barn to sleep in when it snows."

The farmer can't believe it! The cowboy then asks the farmer if he can talk to his sheep. The farmer thinks about it for a second and then says..."Well, I guess so, BUT THOSE SHEEP ARE GODDAM LIARS!"

Hmmmmmmmmmmm :rolleyes:

I know what you mean. I don't get it either, but I posted it anyways hoping someone would explain it to me...

It's really pretty simple.

Sheep, in whatever variety, are much the same as cruise companies, sorority girls, government officials, time-share or cruise salesmen, conservationist-types and Democrats (or Republicans, depending upon your gullibility level). None of them are to be trusted, virtually all of them are liars and, although some of them appear to be warm, soft and fluffy, they will all turn on you, given half a chance.

Lawyers and lions are better trusted with your deepest desires and will, for the most part, be better stewards of your secrets.

It's either that or sheep are easy and loose-lipped; I can't remember which.

I could explain it to ya, but yall might think less of me than you already do:-)

Yeah, CrackerLarry, I think you're on the right track.

The answer seemed obvious to me. In some quarters, men have been known to ummmm how can I put this... have sex with sheep. The farmer is already protesting what the sheep will say when asked how it is on the farm.

Hmmmmmmmmm :rolleyes:

LOL! Thanks for clearing that up for me

And along the same line.....


An Arkansa hillbilly inherits a farm in rural Kentucky.

After a couple weeks he walks to the local bar looking for companionship, but no one except a few farmers were there.

What do yall do for sex around here? He asks the bartender.

Well, when we can't stand it anymore we take Miss Sally the mule around back, answered the bartender. She don't mind and you're welcome to use her.

Oh no, says the hillbilly, I ain't that bad off, yet!

So he leaves unfulfilled. After a few more weeks Miss Sally starts sounding better and he heads back for the bar.

I figured you'd be back says the bartender. Miss Sally is right out back, help yourself.

A few minutes later there's huge commotion out back, he-hawing, screaming and fightin sounds.

Everyone rushes outside to find the hillbilly on the ground, his pants down, his eyes blacked and a bloody nose. I thought you said this mule was stump broke! said the hillbilly.

Never said such a thing, says the bartender. Are you crazy? I meant we use Miss Sally to ride down the road to the cathouse!