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#196913 09/27/06 04:48 PM
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 11,062
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uh oh, now you're gonna get called out on that law.... I hear there are lots of b&b&b babes in Victoria!

(nice recovery attempt Bob :p )


_ _ _ _ _ _ _________________ _ _ _ _ _ _
But then what do I know, I am but a mere caveman
#196914 09/27/06 04:55 PM
A
Anonymous
Anonymous
A
No problem here, Nova - I'm neither blonde nor dumb! laugh

#196915 09/27/06 05:13 PM
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 1,444
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Yeah, well after that collapse by MSU last Sat night people were certainly wondering about the intelligence of the coaching staff in East Lansing! confused


I've already told you more than I know.
#196916 10/03/06 12:32 PM
A
Anonymous
Anonymous
A
Everyone knows that if you are going to operate a business in today's world you need a domain name. It is advisable to look at the domain name selected as others see it and not just as you think it looks. Failure to do this may result in situations such as the following (legitimate) companies who deal in everyday humdrum products and services but clearly didn't give their domain names enough consideration:

1. A site called 'Who Represents' where you can find the name of the agent that represents a celebrity. Their domain name is www.whorepresents.com

2. Experts Exchange, a knowledge base where programmers can exchange advice and views at www.expertsexchange.com

3. Looking for a pen? Look no further than Pen Island at www.penisland.net

4. Need a therapist? Try Therapist Finder at www.therapistfinder.com

5. Then of course, there's the Italian Power Generator company: www.powergenitalia.com

6. And now, we have the Mole Station Native Nursery, based in New South Wales: www.molestationnursery.com

7. If you're looking for computer software, there's always www.ipanywhere.com

8. Welcome to the First Cumming Methodist Church Their website is www.cummingfirst.com

9. And there are these brainless art designers and their whacky website: www.speedofart.com

10. Want to holiday in Lake Tahoe? Try their brochure website at www.gotahoe.com

#196917 10/03/06 04:15 PM
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 1,770
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Once upon a time there were two brothers. One brother was very mischievous, always getting into trouble. The other brother, however, was very good. He was always kind to animals, helped elderly neighbors, and led an exemplary life.

As time went on, the brothers stayed in touch but were never close. The evil brother became a heavy drinker and a womanizer. The other brother was a devoted husband and father and supported many charities.

One day the evil brother died. Then, after a few years, the good brother passed away. He went to heaven and was rewarded with a happy afterlife. One day he went to God and asked, "Where is my brother? He died before me, but I have not seen him here in heaven."

God replied, "As you know, your brother led an evil life, so he is not spending eternity here in heaven. He has been sent elsewhere."

"I'm sorry to hear that", the good brother replied."But I do miss him and wish I could see him again."

"You can see him if you wish", God said. "I will give you the power to gaze into hell." So the power was granted and the good brother gazed into hell.

Before long he saw his brother sitting on a bench. In one arm he held a keg of beer, and in the other he cradled a gorgeous young blonde. The good brother turned to God and said, "I can't believe what I'm seeing. I have found my brother, and he has a keg of beer in one arm and a beautiful woman in the other. Surely, hell can not be that bad."

God explained."Things are not always as they seem.The keg has a hole in it and the blonde doesn't."


It's never too late to have a happy childhood!
#196918 10/04/06 10:57 AM
Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 5,563
Offline
New town in the northwest - Udapimp, Idaho.


Harriette
Take only pictures leave only bubbles
#196919 10/09/06 08:40 AM
Joined: Feb 2006
Posts: 1,444
Offline
Post-Modern Stupidity
Phantom phoner targets his employer
By Gene Weingarten
Sunday, October 8, 2006; Page W40
People familiar with this column know that I periodically telephone customer relations specialists to give them a hard time about their products. Readers occasionally write in to call me cruel, asking how employees of my newspaper would like it if it was done to them. Let's find out! For this column, I telephoned only numbers at The Washington Post.
Real Estate Classified
Me: I would like to submit an open house listing.
Erin: Okay. Do you have the wording?
Me: Large Victorian home in fashionable Georgetown, fully modernized, six bedrooms, five baths, gourmet kitchen, one-half acre, $250,000.
Erin: Wow. I guess you want to sell.
Me: It will get a lot of foot traffic?
Erin: You can barely buy a condo for that.
Me: Listen, you're not going to call back the owner to check on this, are you?
Erin: What do you mean?
Me: It's technically my neighbor's house. He's a jerk. His daughter's wedding is there on Sunday, so I figured we could make the day a little more interesting for him, if you see what I mean.
Erin: I can't place this ad, sir.
Me: But I'm willing to pay for it.
Erin: I don't care. You just told me it's not your home!
Me: What if I threw in a little something extra for you?
Eric: Sir, you cannot pay me! That's unethical.
Me: So?
- - -
David Brown, MD, The Post's medical writer
Me: As a parent and political conservative, I would like to express my outrage over your article titled "E. Coli Blamed on Spinach."
David: Okay . . .
Me: Do you have any idea how hard it is to get children to eat spinach without an article suggesting it will give them fire-hose diarrhea?
David: Are you serious?
Me: Yes.
David: Well, this is not a prohibition against eating spinach for the rest of your life. Just not eating prepackaged fresh spinach until this outbreak is . . .
Me: Well, connect the dots, man! It's a subliminal message, typical of the liberal press in its war on family values. You are always trying to subvert parental authority, aren't you?
David: Would you expose your child to a potentially fatal disease? Is that better than discouraging him from eating a green, leafy vegetable?
Me: Yes.
David: It's an interesting point of view.
Me: While you're at it, why don't you just write an article that says obeying your parents can cause leprosy?
David: I . . . just . . . don't . . . quite . . . know . . . where . . . to . . . start.
Me: Are you a pinko?
- - -
Personal Classified Advertising
Me: I have an ad I'd like to place. Could you give me your opinion of it?
Deanna: Sure.
Me: "SWM seeking female employed in the newspaper industry, preferably in personals ads intake."
Deanna: Nobody's ever placed an ad like that.
Me: Think there's a market? Know anyone like that?
Deanna: Only me.
Me: Great!
Deanna: I'm married.
Me: Well, do you have a sister?
- - -
Circulation
Me: I would like to buy a subscription to The Washington Post, but I have a small, specific request.
Jane: Okay.
Me: You know those long plastic sleeves the paper comes in? Well, every day I would like two of them. You'd put the paper in one and a meatball sub in the other.
Jane: Ha-ha.
Me: Really.
Jane: I don't think so.
Me: You people are always offering special subscription deals. That's mine.
Jane: I don't have a deal like that. I do apologize.
Me: Good God, no wonder the newspaper business is dying. You people don't really want to sell subscriptions, do you?
Jane: I just can't do anything about a meatball sub.
Me: How about tuna fish?


I've already told you more than I know.
#196920 10/13/06 07:39 AM
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,828
Hon Offline
Offline
San Pedro construction site safety...

[Linked Image]


Newfoundlanders are the only people in heaven who want to go home.
#196921 10/13/06 07:55 AM
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 7,059
Offline
Gotta love'em.


Dare To Deviate
#196922 10/13/06 11:16 AM
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 2,200
Offline
That's funny Hon!!! laugh


Take the road less traveled
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