AmbergrisCaye.com Home Forums The Cayes Ambergris Caye Just how many out there from Texas????

Hey Jesse... the VA hospital in Houston? I am there about once a month... let me know when you're coming up again.

After seeing the various 'rules' on the list in the last few weeks, I
thought I'd share these with y'all. You're always welcome here in Texas,
but just keep these in mind......

RULE 1

Don't order a steak at a Waffle House. They serve breakfast 24
hours a day. Let them cook something they know.


RULE 2

Don't laugh at folks' names. Merleen, Bodie, Luther Ray,
TommieJo, Johnny Bob, Mari Beth, Marva, Edna Earl, and Inez
have been known to whip a man's ass for less than that.


RULE 3

Don't order a bottle of pop or a can of soda; this can lead to a
beating. Down here it's called Coke, even if you want a Pepsi,
Sprite, or Dr. Pepper. Got it?


RULE 4

Southern women don't fancy the smart mouth Yankees. Just
remember, they all have Big brothers and Bigger daddies and can
probably kick your ass themselves.


RULE 5

Don't show allegiances to any other school football team but the
Longhorns or Aggies. All the others are a bunch of candy asses
who play Wyoming every week.


RULE 6

Don't call us a bunch of hillbillies. Most of us are better
educated than you and a whole lot nicer to boot. We just talk
this way to [#%!] you off.


RULE 7

Yes, we know the humidity is high and it's hot; just quit
complaining, spend your money, and go home.


RULE 8

No, the state symbol of TEXAS is not the orange and white
highway barrel. This road construction is ticking us off too.


RULE 9

Don't go to the Cracker Barrel and order toast. If you do this,
everyone will know you're from Nebraska. Just eat the biscuits
like God meant for you to do. And do not order poached eggs.
No one from Texas eats eggs poached.


RULE 10

Don't try to talk with a Texas accent if you don't have one or use
regional idioms you can't possibly understand. Nothing makes us
madder.


RULE 11

Don't be telling everybody how much better it was back home.
We're not going to change to make you happy. So if you don't
like it here, Delta is ready when you are!


RULE 12

Our food isn't overcooked; yours is undercooked.


RULE 13

Down here, "Kiss my ass" is a perfectly acceptable way to close
an argument. You can't get more closure than that.


RULE 14

Flirting is a Southern tradition. It doesn't mean you're going home
with someone later. It doesn't mean the person flirting with you is
even interested. It's all just practice.


RULE 15

Take your hat off when you say the words "Tom Landry."

Ahhhh...Lyndend very nice list of rules, however, the most important one I've noticed is...never, under any circumstance should you use your turn signal when changing lanes, that just gives the other drivers advance notice to what you're doing next.

Awl rite den. Yew just pinched a nerve of a native TEXAN, Tick Tok. Yew aawtt not tawk like dat, yew jest a Bawy! (from Slingblade).

I live near the Dallas/Fort Worth MetroMess and I count myself (as a native Texan) as less than 1 in 10 of the people that drive and live around here. I was born and grew up here and I have seen this area !EXPLODE! since the late 1970's/ early 1980's and counting. I for one, signal every lane change to let people know my intentions. That does not keep the asshole behind me from (not signaling) jump into the lane beside me and keeping me from steering into the lane I want to go to. Most of the people I see jumping lanes w/o signaling are (in order) (1) orientals - they are always in a hurry. (2) WOMEN - they just got off the cell phone, have put on their makeup, and just REALIZED WHAT THE HELL they were doing. (3) People that Ain't from around here.

This is why I am coming to Belize! At least for one week I won't have to worry about that shit! I even work for an Asian owned company that begins with Fu... Imagine that!
Anyway, I agree with Lyndend and (I like de way yew tawk too!)

Texas Folks,
Thank GOD I don't have to risk my life daily on the interstate or expressway. On the few occasions that I do go into Houston, I hold my breath and have white knuckles and jello knees when I arrive at my destination. In the Texas countryside, the worst traffic jam I get into is cattle crossing the road to a new pasture, or GIANT farm equipment that you can't see around going 10 mph. Ahhh....The country life....
Debbie

TexasDawg...

My intention wasn't to make you mad...I for one am like you...I ALWAYS use my turn signal. The funny thing is when you signal, the assh*le in the next lane floors it just so you won't get in front of him/her. Its ridiculous the way they drive around here. I drive almost 70 miles a day to work, all on the Beltway/Toll Road...long commute, with really bad drivers to deal with. I don't talk on my cell phone or put on my make up while I'm driving. Hmmmm...what a concept, I actually pay attention to the road

Hi ya' Debbie!!

ARRRRGGGGGGGG!!! TRAFFIC JAMS!

OH YEA....I DON'T DO THOSE ANYMORE!

*putting along in my broken down golf cart*

Okay all of you Texans...you haven't lived until you have driven (or even just went along for the ride) in Italy. Talk about CRAZY drivers...unbelievable. Drive way too fast, dart in and out of traffic, make three lanes out of two, or sometimes four lanes from two if you count the motorbikes and all.
Saw a lot of cars without side mirrors (lying back in the street somewhere). They tailgate, and honk repeatedly if you don't get out of their way fast enough. Pedestrians had better be very fast or they will be dead. Give me our crazy USA drivers any day.

Well, I, too, and from Texas, and Debbie, believe it or not, I grew up in Bay City! Now I live in Austin -- have lived here 25 years. Hook 'em, Horns! I'm married to a great guy who does development consulting. I am a legal secretary.

I've been to Belize twice, once in 1995 with two other ladies, and then in 1998 with one of those ladies and our husbands. I, too, have fallen in love with the place. Each time we have spent some time on AC and some time at Blancaneaux. We are planning to return in May, bringing my daughter, 19, and her boyfriend to do some diving and r&r.

I've read the board for months, but haven't posted in a long time. What a great group you guys are!

JJ Smith

jjs21....


Didn't you just love Blancaneaux? My husband and I were there a couple weeks ago and were SOOOO relaxed there...seems like I only had enough energy to drink that delicious merlot behind the bar Don't get me wrong...we loved San Pedro and Ambergris Caye as well, just different scenary. I miss it already!

Jill