El Doctor Amor
Dr. Love is the island's greatest authority on just about everything. Dr. Love answers questions about love, life, relationships, and various other things that people just don't get. The doctor does not address questions about politics or religious issues.
You may write to the Doctor at P.O. Box 35, San Pedro Town, Belize, fax 026-2905 or E-mail at email@example.com.
Dear Dr. Love,
I noticed in last week's paper (it
took only a week to arrive in Connecticut this time) that a certain local
airline will be providing an in-flight magazine. Given that most flights
don't last more than 25 minutes, I wonder if they will provide a speed
reading course, too. And another question; How did that man cause a bicycle to
be going the wrong way on a one-way street? Remote control?
There are magazines and then there are
magazines. The Doctor can read everything worthwhile in a People magazine in
less than three minutes. It takes another two minutes to look at the pictures.
Time, U.S. News and World Report, and Forbes magazine take about two minutes to
look at the pictures and a full minute to read the newsworthy parts. On the
other hand, Playgirl and Playboy deserve closer scrutiny. People who purchase
these magazines usually do so for the quality of the articles. People who
purchase the other magazines do so because it makes them feel like they are in
the information loop. The Doctor is certain that the airline magazine will be
quick and worthwhile reading. Hopefully, it will have a lot of pictures,
My good Doctor,
I've noticed recently a number of
Belize-flagged ships in the news involved in heavy poaching. For example, bonds
of $1.5 million were posted and lost for the owners of the Belizean flagged
"Salvore" and $50,000 in personal fines imposed on officers after they
were found guilty of illegal fishing in the West Australian District Court
/s/ The Fish Afficionado
Now you, the Doctor and everyone else knows why the Belizean flag is
on suspect vessels with suspect owners. It rhymes with honey, funny,
bunny and unlike love, it is what really makes the world go around.
other hand, the Doctor has noticed that a number of cars in the
Texas license plates have been robbing convenience stores in
the state of
Louisiana. Should we ask how the great state of Texas can
name to be sullied by licensing cars to criminals? You may not
like it, but
it is still the same principle. Is Liberia the country shipping all of those
drugs from Columbia to the U.S.?
Dear Doctor Love,
My sister and
I are both involved with married men who have promised to leave their wives and
families. I am beginning to think that neither of
them ever will. A few
months ago, my sister's boyfriend made a pass at me
and it shocked me
so much that I didn't even try to discourage him. When he
kissed me I
found that it was impossible to resist him. Now I am in serious trouble. I am
pretty sure that I am pregnant and I don't know who the
father is. It
could be either my boyfriend or my sister's boyfriend and
both of them
are married. Should I tell my sister? What will I tell my
boyfriend? Is there
any way out of this mess?
it. The first thing to do is find out whether or not you are
Heed the Doctor; there is absolutely no future in seeing a married man. A woman
either, for that matter. No matter what they tell you, they are not going to
leave the spouse for the lover. If you are pregnant, you can approach each man
individually and tell them that they are possibly the father. This will probably
do no good at all since neither will
immediately assume that it is his child.
You will be admitting to your
boyfriend that you were unfaithful and to the
other one that you are seeing
someone else. You may just have to wait and see
who the child looks like
when it grows up.
Dear Doctor Love,
There is a lot of controversy in town about the re-building of
after Hurricane Mitch. The town board says that no docks will be
without certain restrictions and the dive shop and boat owners say
cannot live with the restrictions.
The town board has a terrific
point because the dock posts do cause
erosion. Boat and dive shop owners have
a point because they have to make a living. Instead of sinking dock pilings, why
not tether some barges at the end of the streets where the town board needs a
dock. Then use floating docks on pontoons to reach the barges. Tours and ferry
boats can take off from
the barges and three or four of them, adequately
spaced, should serve the
downtown area well. The barges can be anchored
permanently to pylons that will not cause erosion. In case of a storm, both the
barges and pontoons
can be moved to safety.
This sounds so good that there must be a fatal
flaw in it somewhere.
Dear Dr. Love,
We have a rooster but his three hens have all died. Ever
died he has become very mean and always tries to spur anyone who
around. Please ask your readers if they have a spare hen. It would make
rooster very happy.
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