Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 1 of 3 1 2 3
Thurs. Funny! #183352
10/20/05 05:33 PM
10/20/05 05:33 PM
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 4,294
travelqueen Offline OP
travelqueen  Offline OP
Original 'Out Of Office' Auto Replies

11. I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I
fail to get the position. Be prepared for my mood.

10. You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of
the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received
anything at all.

9. Sorry to have missed you but I am at the doctors having my brain
removed so that I may be promoted to upper management.

8. I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless e-mails you
send me until I return from vacation on 01/05. Please be patient and
your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.

7. Thank you for your e-mail. Your credit card has been charged
$5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in
your message.

6. The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and
is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and
try sending again. (the beauty of this is that when your return, you
can see how many in-duh-viduals did this over and over).

5. Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing
system. You are currently in 352nd place, and expect to receive a
reply in approximately 19 weeks.

4. Hi. I'm thinking about what you've just sent me. Please wait by
your PC for my response.

3. Hi! I'm busy negotiating the salary for my new job. Don't bother
to leave me any messages.

2. I've run away to join a different circus.


1. I will be out of the office for the next 2 weeks for medical
reasons. When I return, please refer to me as "Loretta" instead of

Re: Thurs. Funny! #183353
10/20/05 07:01 PM
10/20/05 07:01 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 224
Northeast US
Gwennan Offline
Gwennan  Offline
Hey TQ! That was hilarious. I'm working on getting to SP soon so I can get our stand running! Hopefully I'll get at least a long weekend in before Christmas! Congrats again, on the Astros!

Re: Thurs. Funny! #183354
10/21/05 09:58 AM
10/21/05 09:58 AM
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 4,294
travelqueen Offline OP
travelqueen  Offline OP
oooooo when before Christmas, perhaps during Jazz Fest?? wink

Go Astros!!!

Re: Thurs. Funny! #183355
10/22/05 09:28 PM
10/22/05 09:28 PM
Joined: Jan 2003
Posts: 3,273
San Pedro
Kra-Z-K Offline
Kra-Z-K  Offline
toooooooooo funny, one of the best email forwards ever.

Re: Thurs. Funny! #183356
10/23/05 10:08 AM
10/23/05 10:08 AM
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 4,268
Bellaire, Tx. and the World
Denny Shane Offline
Denny Shane  Offline
OMG, I needed a good laugh this morning! This did it! eek

Re: Thurs. Funny! #183357
10/25/05 09:04 PM
10/25/05 09:04 PM
Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 1,123
San Pedro& Indiana
indygal Offline
indygal  Offline
Thanks travelqueen smile cool laugh wink

Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain.
Re: Thurs. Funny! #183358
10/26/05 04:03 PM
10/26/05 04:03 PM
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 4,294
travelqueen Offline OP
travelqueen  Offline OP
Blond & Football...

Football FINALLY makes sense.......... A guy took his Blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench.

After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience.

"Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."

Dumbfounded, her date asked, "What do you mean?"

"Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was: 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!' I'm like...Helloooooo? It's only 25 cents!!!!

Re: Thurs. Funny! #183359
10/26/05 05:03 PM
10/26/05 05:03 PM
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 4,294
travelqueen Offline OP
travelqueen  Offline OP

I was sitting at the counter in a diner recently,

next to a blond woman who was engrossed in readinng

her newspaper.

I noticed one of the headlines that blared:

"12 Brazilian Soldiers Killed." I could see that

she shook her head at the sad news as she read

the article.

Then, suddenly she turned and asked,

"How many is a Brazilian?"

Re: Thurs. Funny! #183360
10/27/05 02:59 PM
10/27/05 02:59 PM
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 79
USA Northern Illinois
lasergod Offline
lasergod  Offline
What's In A Name?

A man scanned the guests at a party and spotted an attractive woman standing alone.

He approached her and asked her name.

"My name is Carmen," she told him.

"That's a beautiful name," he said. "Did your mother give it to you?"

"No," she replied. "I gave it to myself. It reflects the things I like most in my life -- cars and men."

They continued to talk and finally she asked, "What's your name"?

"Beer Sex,"... he replied
Re: Thurs. Funny! #183361
10/27/05 04:17 PM
10/27/05 04:17 PM
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,018
Sequim, WA & San Pedro
Loansum-Al K Offline
Loansum-Al K  Offline
I am looking at these 2 pictures side by side and cannot tell the difference. There is suppose to be 3 things that are different in this pic. Help please!

I'm happier than a pig in s__t...a foot on the sand...and a Belikin in my hand!
Page 1 of 3 1 2 3

Portofino Resort- Now with a new BEACH BAR!!
Click for excellent scuba lessons with Elbert Greer!
Chaa Creek is an award-winning luxury Belize Resort, rated as one of the worlds best Eco Lodges. We are a pioneer in adventure travel to Belize since 1981!
Maruba Beach Klub and Spa is the premiere Secret Beach spa and restaurant located on the crystal blue waters of the Caribbean Sea at the center of Secret Beach, Belize
First Class Accommodations for the Budget Traveler
First Class Accommodations for the Budget Traveler

Things to do

Daily News
Daily Weather

Classified Ads
San Pedro Sun
Ambergris Today
SP Town Council
Channel 7
Channel 5
Love FM
The Reporter
TV Newscasts
Radio Stations

Click for our
Search thousands of Belizean-only websites
To Get Your Questions Answered

Event Guides
Event Calendar
Specials & Events
Things to Do
iTravel Belize
Paradise Theater
San Pedro Fun Finder
Paradise Guy Event Calendar
Cayo Event Calendar

San Pedro Scoop!
Tia Chocolate
My Beautiful Belize
I-Travel Belize
Belize Adventure
Belize Hub
Romantic Travel
Belize Happy Adventures
Conch Creative
Caribbean Culture & Lifestyle
More Blogs...
Search thousands of Belizean-only websites
White Sands Dive Shop - 5 Star PADI Dive Facility - Daily diving, SCUBA instruction and Snorkeling
Caribbean Inspired All Natural Condiments & Spice Blends, Over 100 are Gluten Free!
We manage a variety of homes, apartments, condos and commercial properties here on Ambergris Caye. Our minimum lease on ALL properties is six months.
Click for Ian Anderson's Caves Branch, Welcome to a World of Adventure
Lil Alphonse has snorkel equipment to fit anyone as well as Marine Park Tickets and flotation devices to assist those not as experienced.
Coastal Xpress offers a daily scheduled ferry run to most resorts, restaurants and private piers on the island of Anbergris Caye. We also offer  private and charter water taxi service.
1 2 3
4 5 6 7 8 9 10
11 12 13 14 15 16 17
18 19 20 21 22 23 24
25 26 27 28 29 30 31
Cayo Espanto
Click for Cayo Espanto, and have your own private island
More Links
Click for exciting and adventurous tours of Belize with Katie Valk!
ShoutChat Box
Who's Online Now
0 registered members (), 137 guests, and 0 spiders.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Statistics
Most Online5,530
Jun 13th, 2021 HELP! Visitor Center Goods & Services San Pedro Town Message Board Lodging Diving Fishing Things to Do History Maps Phonebook Belize Business Directory Picture of the Day

The opinions and views expressed on this board are the subjective opinions of Ambergris Caye Message Board members
and not of the Ambergris Caye Message Board its affiliates, or its employees.

Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.1