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Q. What geometric shape most resembles a lost parrot?

A. A Polly-gone.



(sorry, I just had to)

A young guy from North Dakota moves to Florida and goes to a big "everything under one roof" department store looking for a job.

The Manager says, "Do you have any sales experience?" The kid says "Yeah. I was a vacuum salesman back in North Dakota ."

Well, the boss was unsure, but he liked the kid and figured he'd give him a shot, so he gave him the job.
"You start tomorrow. I'll come down after we close and see how you did."

His first day on the job was rough, but he got through it. After the store was locked up, the boss came down to the sales floor.
"How many customers bought something from you today?" The kid frowns and looks at the floor and mutters, "One". The boss says "Just one?!!? Our sales people average sales to 20 to 30 customers a day.
That will have to change, and soon, if you'd like to continue your employment here. We have very strict standards for our sales force here in Florida . One sale a day might have been acceptable in North Dakota , but you're not on the farm anymore, son."
The kid took his beating, but continued to look at his shoes, so the boss felt kinda bad for chewing him out on his first day. He asked (semi-sarcastically), "So, how much was your one sale for?"
The kid looks up at his boss and says "$101,237.65".
The boss, astonished, says $101,237.65?!? What the heck did you sell?"
The kid says, "Well, first, I sold him some new fish hooks. Then I sold him a new fishing rod to go with his new hooks. Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down the coast, so I told him he was going to need a boat, so we went down to the boat department and I sold him a 20 foot Lund with 2 Merc 150's. Then he said he didn't think his Honda Civic would pull it, so I took him down to the automotive department and sold him that 4x4 Expedition."

The boss said "A guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold him a boat and a TRUCK!?"

The kid said "No, the guy came in here to buy tampons for his wife, and I said, 'Dude, your weekend's shot, you should go fishing.........'"

Amanda,
When you started this thread over 6 years ago, did you imagine that over the years it would have over 30 million views?!?!?!?
Incredible!!!

Loansum, thanks a lot! I just spent an hour back at the start... Good stuff!

A bakery owner hires a young female clerk who likes to wear very short skirts and thong panties. One day a young man enters the store, glances at the clerk and at the loaves of bread behind the counter. Noticing her short skirt and the location of the raisin bread, he has a brilliant idea. "I'd like some raisin bread please," the man says. The female clerk nods and climbs up a ladder to reach the raisin bread, which is located on the very top shelf. The young, man standing almost directly beneath her, is provided with an excellent view, just as he thought.

When she descends the ladder he decides that he had better get two loaves, as he is "having company for dinner." As the clerk retrieves the second loaf of bread, one of the other male customers notices what's going on. Thinking quickly, he requests his own loaf of raisin bread so they can continue to enjoy the view.



With each trip up the ladder, the young lady seems to catch the eye of another male customer. Pretty soon, each male customer is asking for raisin bread, just to see the clerk climb up and down the ladder.



After many trips, she is tired, irritated and begins to wonder "why the unusual interest in the raisin bread?" Atop the ladder one more time, she looks down and glares at the men standing below.



Then, she notices an elderly man standing amongst the crowd. Thinking that she can save herself a trip, she yells at the elderly man, "Is it raisin for you too?" "No," stammers the old man, "but it's quivering a little."

Thinking of you Harriette



I've received many remarkable nature photographs over the years but
This photo of a nesting Falcon is perhaps the most remarkable nature
Shot that I've ever seen. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.
Nature is truly breath taking!

A FALCON NESTING IN A TREE

http://i.imgur.com/YW6Fufm.jpg

Champion: Thanks so much for a good chuckle to start my day. I was very curious when I saw that Rykat had posted here - figured he got lost and I would find hi and send him back where he belongs.

Champion: Thanks so much for a good chuckle to start my day. I was very curious when I saw that Rykat had posted here - figured he got lost and I would find hi and send him back where he belongs.

Nice! What do the "chicks" look like?