The coach had put together the perfect team for the Detroit
Lions. The only thing missing was a good quarterback. He
had scouted all the colleges and even the Canadian and
European Leagues, but he couldn't find a ringer who could
ensure a Super Bowl victory.

Then one night, while watching CNN, he saw a war-zone scene
in northern Iraq. In one corner of the background, he spotted
a young Assyrian Muslim soldier with a truly incredible arm.
He threw a hand-grenade straight into a window from 80 yards
away. Then he threw another from 50 yards down a chimney, and
then hit a passing car going 80 miles per hour.

"I've got to get this guy!" coach said to himself." He has
the perfect arm!"

So, he brings the young Afghan to the States and teaches him
the great game of football...and sure enough the Lions go on
to win the Super Bowl. The young Assyrian is hailed as a hero
of football and when the coach asks him what he wants, all
the young man wants to do is call his mother.

"Mom," he says into the phone, "I just won the Super Bowl!"

"I don't want to talk to you," the old Muslim woman says.
"You deserted us. You are not my son!"

"Mother, I don't think you understand," pleads the son, "I've
just won the greatest sporting event in the world!"

"No! let me tell you," his mother retorts. "At this very moment
there are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of
rubble. Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their
lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so
she doesn't get raped!"

The old lady pauses then tearfully says, " I will never for-
give you for making us move to Detroit!"