The Wisdom Of Larry the Cable Guy.....�
�

�
1. A day without sunshine is like night.
�
2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
�
3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
�
4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
�
5. Remember, half the people you know are below average.
�
6. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
�
7. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
�
8. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap.
�
9. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
�
10. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
�
11. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
�
12. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
�
13. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.
�
14. OK, so what's the speed of dark?
�
15. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
�
16. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
�
17. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
�
18. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
�
19. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?
�
20. Why do psychics have to ask you your name?
�
21. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, 'What the heck happened?'
�
22. Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.
�
23. Light travels faster than sound.. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
�
24. Life isn't like a box of chocolates; it's more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.

It's rarely rocket science, it's usually just math: then again if you can't do the math.......